Bohemian Curry
(Sing along to the tune of Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody".)

Naan-aa, just killed a man
Poppadom against his head
Had lime pickle, now he's dead.
Naan-aa, dinner just begun
But now I'm going to cr** it all away.
Naan-aa, ooh-ooh
Didn't mean to make you cry,
Seen nothin' yet just see the loo tomorrow,
Curry on, curry on, 'cause nothing really madras.

Too late my dinner's gone
Sends shivers up my spine
Rectum aching all the time.
Goodbye every bhaji, I've got to go
Gotta leave you all behind and use the loo.
Naan-aa, ooh ooh,
This Dopiaza's mild,
I sometimes wish we'd never come here at all...

**** (Guitar solo) ****

I see a little chicken tikka on the side,
Rogan Josh, Rogan Josh pass the chutney made of mango.
Vindaloo does nicely very very spicey ME!
Biryani (Biryani)
Biryani (Biryani)
Biryani and a naan,
(A vindaloo loo looo..)
I've eaten balti, somebody help me
He's eaten balti, get him to a lavatory
Stand you well back 'cos this loo is quarantined.

Here it comes, there it goes, technicolour yawn.
I chunder
It's coming up again
(There he goes)
I chunder It's coming up again
(There he goes)
It's coming up again,
(Up again)
Coming up again
(up again)
Here it comes again
(No no no no no no no no no no).
On my knees, I'm on my knees, I'm on my knees Oh there he goes
This vindaloo Is about to wreck my guts Poor me...Poor me...Poor me!

**** (Guitar solo) ****

So you think you can chunder and still it's alright?
So you want to eat curry and drink beer all night?
Ohhh maybe, now you'll puke like a baby,
Just had to come out, Just had to come right out in here...

**** (Guitar solo) ****

Korma, saag or bhuna,
Balti, naan, bhaji.
It doesn't really matter
It doesn't really matter to me

...... (Anyway my wind blows).